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amfiguree[N'sync] [Basez] [G]
50-50
Author’s Note: Remember how I like to use only dialogue sometimes? During a story, I sometimes suddenly switch to only dialogue – like in Adventure Of The Ass. I wanted to try something different and I was pretty pleased with the result. So I’m trying out this story – an idea I had from long ago – and I’m going to write it in total dialogue. It’s funny, hopefully, rather than all the other sappy stories I write. Hope ya like it!
“Ouch! Josh, stop poking me!”
“...”
“Ow! Stop it!”
“...”
“Hey, okay, okay! Stop! No, no… Josh! No tickling… JOSH!”
“...”
“Ha! I got you to move!”
“Oh, hardy-har-har. Really funny, Joshua Scott. You couldn’t just ASK me to move, like any other regular guy?”
“I’m not any other regular guy. I’m Joshua Scott Chasez and you, my dear Lance, were on MY side of the bed.”
“Since when did we split the bed?”
“Since I decided I didn’t want your hair tickling my face when I try to sleep at night.”
“...and when was that?”
“Uh... just?”
“It’s two *freaking* A.M, Josh. And I was half-asleep. You couldn’t just PUSH me or something?”
“I didn’t wanna wake you.”
“Oh right, Mr. Chasez. And you cleverly decided that poking me and TICKLING me wouldn’t wake me up, hmm?”
“...well, it seemed like a good idea at the time.”
“I swear, if we didn’t need you in the band, I’d kick your scrawny ass.”
“Sorry.”
“You sound sorry.”
“I am.”
“You should be.”
“Well I am.”
“Good. I’m going to bed... night, Josh.”
“...”
“What are you doing NOW, Josh?”
“I thought since we can’t draw a line down the middle of the bed, we could put this bolster here instead.”
“Oh GOD. Save me. WHY, Josh, WHY are you torturing me like this?”
“Like what?”
“Oh, don’t act all innocent with me. I’m trying to SLEEP and YOU are rearranging the BED!”
“Oh. Sorry.”
“Are you happy with the sleeping arrangement now, Mr. I-can’t-sleep-with-hair-in-my-face?”
“Um... yeah.”
“Good. Now SLEEP.”
“...”
“Lance...?”
“WHAT Josh?!”
“Are you mad?”
“Mad about what, Joshua?”
“Mad at me?”
“No, I’m not mad, Josh. I’m just fine and dandy. I’ve been woken up THREE times by you in the span of half an hour. It’s pretty obvious I’m not gonna get a good night’s sleep but nooooo... no, I’m not pissed at you at all, no siree.”
“So you are mad... I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be, Josh. Just... stop waking me up. Please.”
“Kay...”
“...”
“JC! Now the frickin’ PILLOWS?”
“Um... yeah.”
“Oh. My. God. I am absolutely going to scream. Jace, please, do me a favor. Continue this insanity tomorrow night when we’re not drained from a concert and when I can switch rooms with someone else!”
“You’re not gonna sleep with me tomorrow?”
“We’re not SLEEPING together. And no, I am NOT going to share a room with you tomorrow. You’re driving me up the wall.”
“...sorry.”
“I’m not even gonna tell you it’s okay because I can assure you, JC, it’s not.”
“You called me JC... You’re really pissed, aren’t you?”
“If I woke you up four times in a row for completely insane reasons, wouldn’t you be feeling as happy as I am?”
“Sorry.”
“Josh, just stop, okay? Sleep.”
“Kay.”
“...”
“You called me Josh... You’re not mad any more?”
“JC CHASEZ! I am FREAKING furious! OKAY? God, quit waking me up like that! Just SHUT UP!”
“...sor--”
“Don’t even tell me you’re sorry. Let me sleep. PLEASE.”
“...”
“AHHHHHHHHH! Now the blanket! WHAT next?!”
“Lance, where’re you going?”
“Chris! Christopher Kirkpatirck! CHRIS!”
“Uh... you need to see a psychologist?”
“NO! No, dammit, I need a new rooming partner! CHHHRRIIISSSS!”
“Uh, Lance... I think Chris is at least five rooms down the hall. He can’t hear you.”
“I’m going to go to his room right now. Good NIGHT, Jace.”
“...”
“Hi Lance! You’re back!”
“Oh. My. God. You’re still awake. Mr. Hyper is still awake. Mr. I-won’t-let-Lance-sleep. Chris, why, WHY couldn’t you be awake?”
“... I’ll take the floor, kay? Just… don’t be mad at me anymore, Lance.”
“Josh... nah, you don’t have to take the floor. Just… just PLEASE don’t move the bed. PLEASE. I NEED SLEEP.”
“Okay... sorry.”
“It’s okay.”
“...”
“JOSH, for the LAST TIME! Now you have to move the BEDSPREAD!? That’s it! Get off the bed. You take the floor. Good night and good riddance.”
“...do I really have to take the floor?”
“YES!”
“Kay.”
“...”
“Josh? You didn’t REALLY take the fl-”
“Hi Lance!”
“WHOA! Jesus JC, What’re you doing on THIS side of the room?”
“Um, couldn’t sleep.”
“...get up here, Josh.”
“But I thought...”
“Come on.”
“...”
“Josh, PLEASE don’t say you’re STILL arranging the pillows.”
“Um...”
“WHAT’S so bad about sleeping next to me, dammit?”
“Um... well... things could happen.”
“Like what, JC? Being woken up eight times isn’t bad enough, huh? Ooh, now monsters are gonna pop up and EAT US and tooth fairies are g--”
“...”
“Whoa.”
“I told you things would happen.”
“Hmm... eh... kisses do seem to happen in between sentences, don’t they?”
“Uh...”
“Josh, that was...”
“Um... do you wanna do it--”
“...”
“Mmm... I take it you like it as much as I did the first time.”
“Josh, shut up and move the bolster from this stupid line.”
“But--”
“...”
“No buts. Move the pillows. I happen to LIKE the things that are happening.”
“I know... You do?”
“Yeah, Josh, you have nice lips.”
“I’m moving the pillows, I’m moving the pillows.”
“I thought you’d see it my way.”
“...”
“Good, now stop playing with the bed accessories and let me sleep.”
“Kay.”
“...Lance?”
“What now, Josh?”
“You aren’t really gonna switch rooming partners tomorrow, are you?”
“...Nah.”
“Kay... I think I like it better when we don’t split the bed.”
“Mmmhmm.”
“...Lance, think we could do this tomorrow?”
“And the day after?”
“Forever?”
“Tempting.”
“Can we?”
“You like?”
“Yeah.”
“Kay.”
“...”
“Um, Lance... about just now--”
“Love you, Josh.”
“You do?”
“You mind?”
“No.”
“Then yeah, I do.”
“Kay.”
“...”
“Love you too, Lance.”
“Sleep, Josh.”
“Kay.”
“Night.”
“Night, Lance.”
“Finally.”
“Yeah.”
“Sleep well, Josh.”
“You too, Lance.”
-fin-
50-50
Author’s Note: Remember how I like to use only dialogue sometimes? During a story, I sometimes suddenly switch to only dialogue – like in Adventure Of The Ass. I wanted to try something different and I was pretty pleased with the result. So I’m trying out this story – an idea I had from long ago – and I’m going to write it in total dialogue. It’s funny, hopefully, rather than all the other sappy stories I write. Hope ya like it!
“Ouch! Josh, stop poking me!”
“...”
“Ow! Stop it!”
“...”
“Hey, okay, okay! Stop! No, no… Josh! No tickling… JOSH!”
“...”
“Ha! I got you to move!”
“Oh, hardy-har-har. Really funny, Joshua Scott. You couldn’t just ASK me to move, like any other regular guy?”
“I’m not any other regular guy. I’m Joshua Scott Chasez and you, my dear Lance, were on MY side of the bed.”
“Since when did we split the bed?”
“Since I decided I didn’t want your hair tickling my face when I try to sleep at night.”
“...and when was that?”
“Uh... just?”
“It’s two *freaking* A.M, Josh. And I was half-asleep. You couldn’t just PUSH me or something?”
“I didn’t wanna wake you.”
“Oh right, Mr. Chasez. And you cleverly decided that poking me and TICKLING me wouldn’t wake me up, hmm?”
“...well, it seemed like a good idea at the time.”
“I swear, if we didn’t need you in the band, I’d kick your scrawny ass.”
“Sorry.”
“You sound sorry.”
“I am.”
“You should be.”
“Well I am.”
“Good. I’m going to bed... night, Josh.”
“...”
“What are you doing NOW, Josh?”
“I thought since we can’t draw a line down the middle of the bed, we could put this bolster here instead.”
“Oh GOD. Save me. WHY, Josh, WHY are you torturing me like this?”
“Like what?”
“Oh, don’t act all innocent with me. I’m trying to SLEEP and YOU are rearranging the BED!”
“Oh. Sorry.”
“Are you happy with the sleeping arrangement now, Mr. I-can’t-sleep-with-hair-in-my-face?”
“Um... yeah.”
“Good. Now SLEEP.”
“...”
“Lance...?”
“WHAT Josh?!”
“Are you mad?”
“Mad about what, Joshua?”
“Mad at me?”
“No, I’m not mad, Josh. I’m just fine and dandy. I’ve been woken up THREE times by you in the span of half an hour. It’s pretty obvious I’m not gonna get a good night’s sleep but nooooo... no, I’m not pissed at you at all, no siree.”
“So you are mad... I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be, Josh. Just... stop waking me up. Please.”
“Kay...”
“...”
“JC! Now the frickin’ PILLOWS?”
“Um... yeah.”
“Oh. My. God. I am absolutely going to scream. Jace, please, do me a favor. Continue this insanity tomorrow night when we’re not drained from a concert and when I can switch rooms with someone else!”
“You’re not gonna sleep with me tomorrow?”
“We’re not SLEEPING together. And no, I am NOT going to share a room with you tomorrow. You’re driving me up the wall.”
“...sorry.”
“I’m not even gonna tell you it’s okay because I can assure you, JC, it’s not.”
“You called me JC... You’re really pissed, aren’t you?”
“If I woke you up four times in a row for completely insane reasons, wouldn’t you be feeling as happy as I am?”
“Sorry.”
“Josh, just stop, okay? Sleep.”
“Kay.”
“...”
“You called me Josh... You’re not mad any more?”
“JC CHASEZ! I am FREAKING furious! OKAY? God, quit waking me up like that! Just SHUT UP!”
“...sor--”
“Don’t even tell me you’re sorry. Let me sleep. PLEASE.”
“...”
“AHHHHHHHHH! Now the blanket! WHAT next?!”
“Lance, where’re you going?”
“Chris! Christopher Kirkpatirck! CHRIS!”
“Uh... you need to see a psychologist?”
“NO! No, dammit, I need a new rooming partner! CHHHRRIIISSSS!”
“Uh, Lance... I think Chris is at least five rooms down the hall. He can’t hear you.”
“I’m going to go to his room right now. Good NIGHT, Jace.”
“...”
“Hi Lance! You’re back!”
“Oh. My. God. You’re still awake. Mr. Hyper is still awake. Mr. I-won’t-let-Lance-sleep. Chris, why, WHY couldn’t you be awake?”
“... I’ll take the floor, kay? Just… don’t be mad at me anymore, Lance.”
“Josh... nah, you don’t have to take the floor. Just… just PLEASE don’t move the bed. PLEASE. I NEED SLEEP.”
“Okay... sorry.”
“It’s okay.”
“...”
“JOSH, for the LAST TIME! Now you have to move the BEDSPREAD!? That’s it! Get off the bed. You take the floor. Good night and good riddance.”
“...do I really have to take the floor?”
“YES!”
“Kay.”
“...”
“Josh? You didn’t REALLY take the fl-”
“Hi Lance!”
“WHOA! Jesus JC, What’re you doing on THIS side of the room?”
“Um, couldn’t sleep.”
“...get up here, Josh.”
“But I thought...”
“Come on.”
“...”
“Josh, PLEASE don’t say you’re STILL arranging the pillows.”
“Um...”
“WHAT’S so bad about sleeping next to me, dammit?”
“Um... well... things could happen.”
“Like what, JC? Being woken up eight times isn’t bad enough, huh? Ooh, now monsters are gonna pop up and EAT US and tooth fairies are g--”
“...”
“Whoa.”
“I told you things would happen.”
“Hmm... eh... kisses do seem to happen in between sentences, don’t they?”
“Uh...”
“Josh, that was...”
“Um... do you wanna do it--”
“...”
“Mmm... I take it you like it as much as I did the first time.”
“Josh, shut up and move the bolster from this stupid line.”
“But--”
“...”
“No buts. Move the pillows. I happen to LIKE the things that are happening.”
“I know... You do?”
“Yeah, Josh, you have nice lips.”
“I’m moving the pillows, I’m moving the pillows.”
“I thought you’d see it my way.”
“...”
“Good, now stop playing with the bed accessories and let me sleep.”
“Kay.”
“...Lance?”
“What now, Josh?”
“You aren’t really gonna switch rooming partners tomorrow, are you?”
“...Nah.”
“Kay... I think I like it better when we don’t split the bed.”
“Mmmhmm.”
“...Lance, think we could do this tomorrow?”
“And the day after?”
“Forever?”
“Tempting.”
“Can we?”
“You like?”
“Yeah.”
“Kay.”
“...”
“Um, Lance... about just now--”
“Love you, Josh.”
“You do?”
“You mind?”
“No.”
“Then yeah, I do.”
“Kay.”
“...”
“Love you too, Lance.”
“Sleep, Josh.”
“Kay.”
“Night.”
“Night, Lance.”
“Finally.”
“Yeah.”
“Sleep well, Josh.”
“You too, Lance.”
-fin-
